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Contents

[edit] Welcome to the New Fantasy Football Wiki

[edit] Top

<embed src="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ogTOUJcoyPw" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="355"></embed>

This is the ALL NEW website for fantasy football for interested fans. The point being that you can update all the important stuff yourself, so it should be more up to date... mainly because Mellor is such a busy-bee doing all his important German stuff and can't be bothered with it any more. Go on now, click on the button on the top right that has a pen and paper symbol, or any of the "edit" signs next to the section headings.

[edit] Overall Honour Points

[edit] League Table 2007/08 Season

Team Position 1st Half 2nd Half Total
FCB 1st 234 282 516
ZFC 2nd 199 255 454
HOF 3rd 202 210 412
RHR 4th 193 199 392
SDE 5th 177 203 380
SHW 6th 165 182 347
MSK 7th 143 134 277
BSX 8th 151 123 274
ANN 9th 106 130 231
TNP 10th 81 115 196
BVO 11th 59 53 112

[edit] Worthy Links

[edit] News and Transfer Rumours

Moved Here: http://bluwiki.com/go/NFFRumours

[edit] New Transfer News

<COL WIDTH=77> <COL WIDTH=69> <COL WIDTH=69> <COL WIDTH=64> <COL WIDTH=67> <COL WIDTH=40> <COL WIDTH=41> <COL WIDTH=39> <COL WIDTH=37> <COL WIDTH=40> <COL WIDTH=56> <COL WIDTH=39> <COL WIDTH=44> <COL WIDTH=49> <COL WIDTH=39> <COL WIDTH=44> <COL WIDTH=49> <COL WIDTH=86> <COL WIDTH=86> <COL WIDTH=52> <COL WIDTH=86>




Min

Poosition

ANN

BSX

BVO

FCB

HOF

MSK

RHR

SDE

SHW*

TNP

ZFC


Result

For


Importance


Almunia

Arsenal

2.05

Gk





1.6








-

(Not above minimum)


2.7


Alex

Chelsea

2.55

Def





10








5

HOF


7


Benjani

Pompy

2.85

Att





10






5.8


6.8

HOF


9.87

Philippe

Mexès

Roma

1.5

(def)





3








1.5

HOF


4.18

Ricardo

Quaresma

Porto

3

(Att)





3








3

HOF


5.2

Jermaine

Beckford

Leeds

1.5

(att)








3





1.5

SDE


4.18

J

Belletti

Chelsea

2.5

Def





10



11



4.8


11

SDE


13.57

Daniel

de Ridder

Brimingham

1.7

Mid








3





1.7

SDE


4.34

L

Fabianski

Arsenal

2.15

Gk








3





2.15

SDE


4.66

Thomas

Graveson

Everton

1.65

Mid








3





1.65

SDE


4.3

Michael

Johnson

Man C

1.65

Mid








26





13

SDE


9.99

Steven

Taylor

Newcastle

1.8

Def








3



3


-

(tied)


4.81

Eidur

Gudjohnsen

Barca

3

(Att)











3


3

ZFC


5.2

Havard

Nordtveit

Arsenal

1.5

(def)











1.5


1.5

ZFC


3.67

John

Utaka

Pompy

2.85

At











4.2


2.85

ZFC


5.43

Matt

Derbyshire

Blackburn

2.95

Att











6.2


3.1

ZFC


5.97

Nicklas

Bendtner

Arse

3

Att











3


3

ZFC


5.2

Danny

Simpson

Man U

2.3

Def











2.3


2.3

ZFC


4.55

M

Laursen

Villa

1.85

Def











3.3


1.85

ZFC


4.54

Scott

Carson

Villa / liv

2.2

Gk











2.2


2.2

ZFC


4.45

Ashley

Young

Aston Villa

2.05

Mid





3

4





8


5

ZFC


10.23

Craig

Gardner

Villa

1.65

Mid











2.9


1.65

ZFC


4.27

Rob

Green

West H


Gk






2







-

(Already Owned)


1.41

David

Wheater

Mid

1.7

Def






2







1.7

MSK


4.02

Clint

Dempsey

Ful

1.75

Mid






3







1.5

MSK


4.28

Roque

Santa Cruz

Black


Att






4







-

(Already Owned)


2

[edit] Club Pages

[edit] Athletico Nightnurse

http://marvel.wikia.com/images/thumb/7/77/Nightnurse_christinepalmer.png/180px-Nightnurse_christinepalmer.png

#Top

See also: ANN: The Unofficial Fantasy Site

[edit] Players

[edit] First Team

Name Club Points
T Kuszczak MU 4
J Carragher LIV 17
W Gallas ARS 16
JA Riise LIV 12
G Pique MU 5
S Wright-Phillips CHE 11
F Malouda CHE 7
X Alonso LIV 6
G Boateng MID 4
D Drogba CHE 21
H Helguson BOL 3

[edit] Others

  • Hilario CHE
  • Lauren POR
  • J Djourou BIR
  • Daniel Alves (Sevilla)
  • F Ljungberg WH
  • G Fernandes MC
  • KP Boateng TOT
  • D Zokora TOT
  • M Alonso BOL
  • Herald Goulan ???
  • L Lita RDG
  • V Bojinov MC


#Top

[edit] The Blosaxicus

http://chascreek.blogs.com/a_doodle_a_day/images/blow_that_sax_1.JPG

#Top

[edit] First Team:

Verified

Player

Jose Reina

Joseph Yobo
Lucas Neill
Javier Garrido
Jose Boswinga
Anton Ferdinand
Daniel Gabbidon
Aaron Hughes
Robert Huth
Ryan Nelsen
Younes Kaboul


Mickael Essien
Tomas Rosicky
Ryan Babel
Luca Modric
Nigel Reo-Coker
Lucas Levia
Geovanni
James Morrison
Kevin Kilbane


Darren Bent
Dean Ashton
Claudio Pizzaro
Ahmed Mido
Carlton Cole


Ross Turnbull

#Top

right lads, couple of new signings this year bolstering things in midfield and at the back so we are expecting good things. Also the hopeful transformation of Dean Ashton from being the new Darren Anderton to Mr Healthy is like a new signing up front. Bent-y has had a great pre-season and with Robbie Keane boging off to Liverpool he might actually play. Hopes are also high that young Babel will break into Liverpool's first team and that with the arrival of Big Phil, Essien will play some games in midfield rather than being wasted at right back.

We expect a strong mid-table performance

[edit] Transfer Policy

We are not a selling club (unless you want to buy Kevin - been in my scoring team every year - Kilbane)

[edit] Barry Venisons Supermarket Opening

http://www.bbc.co.uk/nottingham/music/2003/07/images/iron_maiden_preview_01_150.jpg

This is the team that most regularly hits the bottom. Oh yeah, hitting the bottom and working the middle. Hittin' the botton and workin' the middle. It's on FIRE!

[edit] BVO Staff

Chairman: Rob "Rim Me" Chaimbermaid Manager: Barry Venison Minder/Fixer: Robert George Physio: Pamela Anderson
http://www.pearlysociety.co.uk/pkqwalthamstow.JPG http://news.bbc.co.uk/olmedia/1340000/images/_1342745_venison_150.jpg http://stuarthughes.blogspot.com/darts.jpg http://bricksandstonesgossip.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/pamela-anderson_223441gbmp.jpg


[edit] BVO Players

  • Unverified
Player Points Position Team Information

Franck Queudrue
Luke Young
Talal El Karkouri
Alan Smith
Belozoglu Emre
Brett Emerton
Danny Murphy
Darren Ambrose
Ivan Campo
James Milner
Nicky Butt
Scott Parker
Darius Vassell
Harry Kewell
Kevin Davies
Mark Viduka
Teddy Sheringham
Anthony Le Tallec
Erik Edman
Gareth Southgate
Jay-Jay Okocha
Patrick Kluivert

6
14
8
9
19
28
17
37
31
54
22
24
33
5
41
77
17
-
-
-
-
-

Defender
Defender
Defender
Midfielder
Midfielder
Midfielder
Midfielder
Midfielder
Midfielder
Midfielder
Midfielder
Midfielder
Striker
Striker
Striker
Striker
Striker
Reserve
Reserve
Reserve
Reserve
Reserve

Fulham
Charlton
Charlton
Man Utd
Newcastle
Blackburn
Tottenham
Charlton
Bolton
Newcastle
Newcastle
Newcastle
Man City
Liverpool
Bolton
Middlesbrough
West Ham
-
-
-
-
-

#Top

[edit] F*** C*** Bollox

FCB is run by the FCBB. It is not the most beloved of all the Fantasy Football Teams but it soon will be as all the glory hunters come and sing.

At long last the inevitable victor of 2007/8.

http://history.sandiego.edu/gen/USPics13/marxbros03.jpg

A picture of the sad demise of the clubs previous manager.

The Chairman: Mikey Tweedie-Quarter-Psmythe

http://www.ruralmissouri.org/Images/RuralMissouri/Jan06/horn.jpg

Stadium:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:VicenteCalderon.jpg

See Also:

FCB: The Unofficial Fantasy Site

The F*** C*** Bollox Official Site

#Top


[edit] The FCB Squad

  • Verified

Update 1/08/2008 (0r 8/1/2008 for Skydder)

#Top

#Top

Squad No. Position Player..................... Points Team Information.................

1
2
3
4
5
15
16
6
8
11
17
18
12
14
10
9
19
20
13

Goal Keeper
Defender
Defender
Defender
Defender
Midfielder
Midfielder
Midfielder
Midfielder
Midfielder
Midfielder
Midfielder
Midfielder
Midfielder
Striker
Striker
Striker
Striker
Striker

Tim Howard
Emmanuel Eboue
Glen Johnson
Kolo Toure
Nemanja Vidic
Joe Cole
John Mikel
Michael Carrick
Mikel Arteta
Simon Davies
Steven Davis
Tim Cahill
Elano
Kerlon Moura Souza
Carlos Tevez
Dimitar Berbatov
Peter Crouch
Ricardo Vaz Te
Tuncay Sanli



















-

Everton
Arsenal
Portsmouth
Arsenal
Man Utd
Chelsea
Chelsea
Man Utd
Everton
Fulham
Fulham
Everton
Man City
Reserve Again
Man Utd
Tottenham
Portsmouth
Bolton
Mid'borough

25 Mil
10 Mil
15 Mil
20 Mil
30 Mil
35 Mil
20 Mil
20 Mil
30 Mil
15 Mil
10 Mil
25 Mil
30 Mil
5 Mil Watch this!!!!
40 Mil.
55 Mil
35 Mil. La Girafa.
5 Mil
10 Mil

#Top

[edit] New Signings

Diego Cavalieri Goalkeeper Liverpool 2.5 Million
Fabio Aurelio Defender Liverpool 2.5 Million
Andrea Dossena Defender Liverpool 21 Million
Giovani dos Santos Midfielder Tottenham 10.5 Million
Joao Moutinho Midfielder Reserve 3 Million
Aaron Ramsey Midfielder Arsenal 2.5 Million
Vagner Love Striker Reserve 5 Million
Mustapha Riga Striker Bolton 2.5 Million

Total 49.5

[edit] Available Players

Although the FCBB does not consider FCB to be a selling club, they are mistaken and no player is considered to be above the interests of the club. Any offer will be listened to with due dilligence and headphones and weighed against whether it equates to the players value to the team. (See above for estimated value)

See also: Available Players

#Top

[edit] Hoops of Fury

http://www.hula-hoops.com/graphics/Lom3b.jpg

Has-beens, where are you now?


#Top

[edit] HOF Players

  • Unverified

[edit] Goalkeepers

David James, Manuel Almunia

[edit] Defence

Sami Hyypia, Gael Clichy, Dan Shittu, Michael Dawson, Tal Ben Haim, Gary Cahill, Gareth Bale, Micah Richards, Curtis Davies

[edit] Midfield

Frank Lampard, Morten Gamst Pedersen, Stiliyan Petrov, Charles N�Zogbia, Gary O�Neil, Matthew Etherington, Jimmy Bullard, Sanz Luis Garcia, Steed Malbranque, Arjen Robben

[edit] Attack

Aiyegbeni Yakubu, Henri Camara,

Thierry Henry, El Hadji-Diouf, Seol Ki-Hyeon, Fernando Torres, Freedy Adu, David Nugent

[edit] Queeries

  • Nathan Ellington (Not in Tim's Records),
  • McMahon? (In the list of players you own)

[edit] Markys Soccerball Kickers

http://memewatch.com/thelist/archives/pix/morans.jpg

Chairman: Marky McSkydder (pictured above).

Manager: Bear Grylls (as seen on TV and in motels)

Ex-Manager: Fle�rgen Klinsmann (sister of J�rgen)

Location: Sunny California

Reserve Team: Doyles Delinquents

Team Physio: Dr. Phil

Team Religious Idol: The Almighty

Team Motto: "Ignorance and fear created Markys Soccerball Kickers; fancy, enthusiasm, or deceit adorned them; weakness worships them; credulity preserves them, and custom, respect and tyranny support them in order to make the blindness of men serve its own interests" Baron d'Holbach

Team Philosophy: Whereof one cannot loz it up, thereof up to one must it be lozzed.

Motivational Team Photo of the Day: Astronomy Picture of the Day and Cheerleaders.

Team Pirate: Maddox

Team Comic Genius and Spiritual Guru: Bill Hicks

[edit] MSK Squad

  • Unverified. The chairman somehow misplaced the roster a couple of seasons ago. Louis Saha. John Something-or-other. James or Jim? Jimmy in net. Couple of useless strikers. Lots of young whipper snappers. Barton the bad boy (captain).

[edit] Goal Keepers

Chris Kirkland: (Wigan), Shay Given: (Newcastle), Cudicini (Chelsea)

[edit] Defenders

Alessandro Pist one: (Everton), Emanuel Pogatetz: (Middlesbrough), Linvoy Primus: (Portsmouth), Mikael Silvestre: (Man Utd), Moritz Volz: (Fulham), Pascal Chimbonda: (Tottenham), Richard Dunne: (Man City), Sol Campbell: (Portsmouth), Stuart Parnaby: (Middlesbrough), Wes Brown: (Man Utd)

[edit] Midfielders

Andy Reid: (Charlton), Boudewijn Zenden: (Liverpool), Darren Fletcher: (Man Utd), Hayden Mullins: (West Ham), Jermaine Jenas: (Tottenham), Joey Barton: (Man City), Mathieu Flamini: (Arsenal), Papa Bouba Diop: (Fulham), Paul Scholes: (Man Utd), John O'Shea: (Man Utd)

[edit] Strikers

Craig Bellamy: (Liverpool), Damien Duff: (Newcastle), Jason Euell: (Middlesbrough), Louis Saha: (Man Utd), Marlon Harewood: (West Ham), Nicolas Anelka: (Bolton)

[edit] Other

Dean Whitehead (Who?)

[edit] For Sale

Make me an offer & I will refuse you outright. This is an absolute law. The only way out of the Kickers is death or free transfer when you leave the league and go to play in freakin' Italy. Damn I-talians. (Not actually true... Kickers allowed Michael Carrick to go to FCB - Ed. Which is effectively death - Ed2. But he got a championship medal out of it - Ed3.)

[edit] Rhodes Rovers

http://www.sterlingtimes.co.uk/cecil_rhodes.jpg

#Top


Rhodes Rhovers, origionally named Rhodes Raj Rhovers, were set up in 1869 in Bombay as a croquet team. "Playing croquet" has since become a commonplace Indian colloquialism for "taking it in the arse", which dates back to the early Imperial British conquest of the indiginous people. The players are still picked depending on their ability to "play croquet", even though they compete in a football league. Some commentators have questioned this decision, but the chairman of Rhodes Rhovers, a Mr Steven Fortesque-Rhodes is adamant that the traditions of this noble club be maintained. He is said to take a personal interest in the selection of the under-16 team.

[edit] RHR Players

  • Unverified

[edit] Goal Keepers

Jens Lehmann, Jussi Jaaskelainen

[edit] Defenders

Alan Stubbs, Chris Lucketti, Christian Dailly, Djimi Traore, Gary Neville, Hatem Trabelsi, Joleon Lescott, Mark Delaney, Peter Ramage, Sun Jihai, Sylvain Distin

[edit] Midfielders

Amdy Faye, Antoine Sibierski, Bryan Hughes, Edgar Davids, Gareth Barry, Lee Hendrie, Leon Osman, Matthew Holland, Phil Jagielka, Phil Neville, Sean Davis

[edit] Strikers

Andrew Johnson, Andy Cole, Bobby Zamora, Brian McBride, Dave Kitson, Kevin Doyle, Marlon King, Obafemi Martins, Solomon Kalou

[edit] Others

Adriano Leite Ribeiro, Darren Huckerby, Gary McSheffrey, Geoff Horsfield, Mateja Ke�man, Michael Chopra, Michael Svensson

[edit] Sheepdog Hood XI

http://www.galleryone.com/images/townsend/townsend-trooper-border-collie.jpg

#Top


Chairman: Tony Virgin

Manager: Stan Collymore

Stadium: Doggers Park

Head Coach: Joey Deacon

Mascot: Bob the Dog

Celebrity Supporters: Steve "the Bronze Adonis" Beaton, Wayne Biggins [1] who achieved the remarkable feat of scoring on his league debut for Stoke in the 1-0 draw at home to West Ham United

Team Songs: "Away in a Manager, a ZFC for a Team", "That Noakes Isn't Funny Anymore" and "If You Get it in Your Eye it Can Blind You".


[edit] Players

[edit] GK

Robinson TOT

[edit] DEF

Ferdinand MANU & Meite BOL
Mellberg AST & Senderos ARS
Upson WHAM

[edit] MID

Bentley BLA Carsley EVE Dyer NEW Giggs MANU Huddlestone TOT Nolan BOL Pennant LIV

[edit] STR

Adebayour ARS Carew ASTV Keane TOT Klose BAYERN M Samaras MANC

[edit] Sparta Harlow*

http://www.losttrails.com/media/Greece/Sparta/sparta03-06b.jpg

#Top

[edit] SHW* Players

  • Unverified

[edit] Goalkeepers

Dean Kiely, Jerzy Dudek

[edit] Defenders

Ashley Cole, Daniel Agger, John Terry, Ledley King, Wayne Bridge

[edit] Midfielders

Claude Makelele, David Dunn, Gary Speed, Steven Gerrard

[edit] Strikers

Henrik Pedersen, James McFadden, Lomana Tresor LuaLua, Luis Boa Morte, Paul Dickov, Robin Van Persie, Wayne Rooney

[edit] Others

Mehdi Nafti, Mikael Forssell, Steve Watson

[edit] Turnips Turnips

http://www.phas.ubc.ca/~dpeets/turnip.jpg

#Top

[edit] TNP Players

  • Unverified

[edit] Goal Keepers

Brad Friedel, Edwin Van der Sar

[edit] Defenders

Benoit Assou-Ekotto, Celestine Babayaro, Danny Mills, Hermann Hreidarsson, Jonathan Spector

[edit] Midfielders

Aleksander Hleb, Kieran Richardson, Mark Gonzalez, Michael Ballack, Stelios Giannakopoulos, Trevor Sinclair

[edit] Strikers

Andriy Shevchenko, Benedict McCarthy, Guiseppe Rossi, Ji-Sung Park, Michael Owen

[edit] Others

Fernando Morientes, Jared Borgetti, Josemi, Kevin Phillips, Marcos Senna, Muzzy Izzet, Pablo Aimar, Robinho, Yaya Toure

[edit] Zusamengesetstew�rteneufu�ballverein

http://www.partydomain.co.uk/d-commerce/media/FancyDress/FunnyFashionMens/Bac342.jpg


http://bp3.blogger.com/_zqzPMzXNGso/R2gUSnYD5pI/AAAAAAAABMw/9_Gv1kl1tt4/s1600/kerrdildo.jpg Ms Mellor enjoying his/her trophy for last season.


German, 1. n., pron. Zussammen-whatever-shaft; A rare flightless bird with dull plumage. Thought to have become extinct in the 80's.
2. n., The best fantasy football team in the game Newfantasyfootball finally after 4 years of strenuous effort.
Etymology: From Quite-High German: zussamen (together) + gesetzt (put) + w�rte (words) + neu (new) + Fu�ball (football) + Verein (Mark sucks gents).
Abbreviation: ZFC, from Zermelo�Fraenkel with Choice, a way of showing that an infinite number of dwarves can tell what colour their hats are.

[edit] Season 06-07 review

Well ZFC fans, what a year it's been! After two years of ZFC being the also rans we finally come up trumps. The new Noakes/Wolff/Cunt team seems to be working wonders, and with a league cup trophy, premiership trophy and fa cup runners up medal, its all looking good for next season. Fans player of the season: John O'Shea (sold).

[edit] Season 07-08 preview

The manager is very depressed and hates the fans and players. The reason is because the chairman is undergoing a sex change operation to finally become a man, after 20 years of lies. Even her good friends didn't know apart from the frequent foul moods and myriad hair care products. Tina will be unveiled at the conclusion of the 07/08 season and all fans are requested to politely not mention the "change". Thank you fans for your consideration.

[edit] Staff

  • Chairman: Tina Mellor[2]
  • Manager: Arbuthnot Cunt
  • Chief Executive: John Noakes
  • Director of Football: Prof. Heinz Wolff
  • Coaches: Chuckle, Paul & Barry
  • Goalkeeping Coach: Krankie, Jimmy
  • Head Mascott: Lord Charles
  • Assistant to the Head Mascott: Les Ferdinand
  • Physio: Dame Edna Everage
  • Head of Fan Club: Sid James

[edit] First Team:

Cech (CHE)
Finnan (LIV)Carvalho (CHE) Evra (MUD)Ferreira (CHE)
Fabregas (c) (ARS)Lennon (TOT) Downing (MID)Taylor (POT)
Kuijt (LIV)Agbolonhar (AST)

[edit] Reserve Team

Sorenson
Sagna (ARS)Onuoha (MCY) Hunt (BOL)Baines (WIG)
Silva (ARS)Barnes (DER) Benayoun (LIV)Walcott (ARS)
Defoe (TOT)Mellor (PRE)

[edit] The Ray Jones Memorial Team


-
Ridgewell (AST)Paletta (LIV) Gilbert (ARS)Boulahrouz (SEV)
Solano (NEW)O'Shea (MUD) Diaby (ARS)Sissoko (LIV)
Spencer (EVE)Jones (QPR)

[edit] Other

Diarra, L (CHE)
Routledge (TOT)

[edit] Day Job

(none)

#Top

[edit] Transfers

[edit] May 2007

Tomas Myhre FCB --> Free aka The Donkey Farm Fcb 14:30, 9 May 2007 (EDT)

Carrol SDE --> Free 14/05/07

Schwarzer SDE --> Free 14/05/07

Bates SDE --> Free 14/05/07

De Zeeuw SDE --> Free 14/05/07

Gardner SDE --> Free 14/05/07

Knight SDE --> Free 14/05/07

Gravesen SDE --> Free 14/05/07

Jensen SDE --> Free 14/05/07

Beattie SDE --> Free 14/05/07

Reyes SDE --> Free 14/05/07

[edit] June 2007

  • Noe Pamarot - from ZFC to FREE (the ZFC board would like to thank Mr Pamarot for his services)
  • Robbie Fowler - from ZFC to FREE (the ZFC board would like to thank Mr Fowler for his services)
  • Young Po Lee - from ZFC to FREE (the ZFC board has nothing to say to Mr Lee)
  • Franck Ribery - from FCB to FREE (TMWNN said "Link!")
  • Angel - from ZFC to FREE (good luck playing for RB New York)











  • The End

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